How To Not Walk The Dog
Thursday, January 12, 2012 at 10:03 PM 
The weather, of late, has been all kinds of vile. Which has caused much muttering and moaning amongst the local dog-walkers. But there’s one man who has this whole walking-the-dogs-in-revolting-weather thing sussed. And how!
The man in question has a rather fancy car. And one of the fanciest features of this fancy car is that the boot (trunk) can be both opened and shut from the driver’s seat. This means the man is able to drive onto the edge of the moor and, with the flick of a switch, open the tailgate, thus allowing his three big, boisterous dogs to leap out. Another flick and the boot shuts again….at which point the man proceeds to drive up the track - dogs tearing along behind - until he reaches the patch of waste ground on top of the moor that constitutes a car park.
Once there, he hunkers down in the cosy warmth of the car, no doubt listening to the radio or reading the newspaper. There’s probably a cup of coffee involved. Meanwhile, the dogs hare about wildly, burning off their high-octane doggy energy, heedless of the gales, hail, rain, mud or ice (frequently all of the above).
When the man deems the dogs to have had enough exercise, he starts the engine once more and drives back down the track, dogs careering alongside. Approaching the road, he pauses the car, hits the fancy switch again and the animals pile inside. One final flick closes the boot….and off he goes. Dogs walked. Man snug and dry. Because man has never left car (or even wound down the window so far as I can tell).
I like to think he drives home to a garage (with an automatic door, of course) attached to his house….meaning he never actually has to set foot outside throughout the whole performance. Heck, he probably still has his slippers on!
There’s more than one envious dog-walker who’s noted the make of this fancy car and started saving pennies….
Reader Comments (7)
Laughing out loud here, what a vivid observation. Clearly you must be just a little envious, especially on the coffee and ....slippers. Surely they are still on. What a wonderful, hillarious picture I now imagine in my head!
Can't imagine it would be your style of walking the dog but maybe it would be nice to have the opportunity. Best of luck
What a fun post - such wonderful imagery (I can almost see him arriving warm & dry in his garage)! Hee hee!
xo
Kristin
p.s. I'm visiting from the "Hello Soul" welcome page - I look forward to getting to know you better :)
Great story! I'm slowly going thru the intros on the HSHB site and was just looking at your site. I just wanted to tell you that I think your photography is stunning!
What a fabulous fun tale and what a clever, imaginative fellow. I can just imagine how envious the other dog walkers are. With the dreadful weather you've been experiencing lately I should imagine you're all saving those pennies as quickly as you can.
Ha! Love it! I knew someone who would walk his dog at night. He would take the short stroll to the village pub on the green, nip inside and buy himself a pint. Then he'd take a seat on the bench outside, pint in one hand and a torch in the other. He'd wave the torch around lighting up the green. The crazy dog would chase the light until it dropped from exhaustion! Man would wander home feigning his own tiredness to his long-suffering wife...
Reason for my visit was say hello again! And... we are both taking the Hello Soul Business course!! Be great to connect again.
Lisa
Hello sweet Helen, so lovely to be visiting you again here been missing LOTS of your post. Will have to catch up. :) This is such a funny story and i can really imagine his car and the dogs. Have a lovely merry happy sunday and love to you!